What Does the Perfect Birth Mean to You?

Planning Your Perfect Birth

What is a Perfect Birth?

What’s the first thought that popped into your head after reading the title above? This doesn’t exist at all, followed by what IS the perfect birth anyway?

It is indeed a very good question. Let me elaborate. It’s important for me to explain what I mean by that and underline, that it is not MY perfect birth but YOURS, your partner’s and your baby’s. It is all about YOU, not your best friend’s birth or what your doctor or midwife believes. Neither the birth story of somebody else you read in that blog nor the relaxed, smooth birth you watched on YouTube the other day. It is not about having a short or calm or totally relaxed birth nor a birth free of intervention or even an all-natural birth. Even though many using the HypnoBirthing techniques for birth preparation achieve this, of course.

It is only about you taking control of your birth, being empowered, feeling confident and transforming your fears into positive feelings. And having the confidence to ask questions and being informed about what is going on during your birth and, therefore, being able to make the right decision in that moment, on that day.

„Prepare for a no-fault birth…
If you confidently participate in all the decisions made during your labor and delivery – even those that were not in your birth plan – you are likely to look upon your birth with no blame and no regrets.“

William & Martha Sears


You may even have a very specific idea of how you want to birth and that’s wonderful, but please be careful. I’m sure you know about having high expectations and what happens if those expectations are not met. You’ll either get disappointed, or even stressed and that’s the last thing you need that day. It is important for you and your baby to not allow these harmful emotions to evolve during your birth.

In the MyGentleBorn course, based on HypnoBirthing, I teach you how to let go of what you believe may be the only way you want to birth – to let go of your expectations. I teach you to be open to whatever comes up on your special day, but to remain aware of your desires so that you still achieve the birth you want.

Let’s be honest here, we just can’t control everything. But we can control the way we think and prepare. The way we stay positive and see things unfold. The way we want it. So in that sense, a perfect birth — no matter what happens — is; what is RIGHT FOR YOU, your partner and your baby.

And keep in mind, not every birth is the same. What you experienced in your 1st birth will most likely not be similar to your 2nd, 3rd, 4th, etc. I had 4 completely different birth experiences, all amazing and unique in their own way, just like my own children’s personalities.

A Perfect Birth is:

  • A birth you can look back on and know all the decisions were yours
  • A birth where your power wasn’t taken away
  • A birth were you and your partner always felt in control, even if you had to be open to whatever turn your birthing takes
  • A birth that was the right one for you, your partner and your baby on that special day
  • A birth you felt prepared for, both emotionally and physically
Your perfect birth
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„The perfect birth is the one that feels right for you on your birthing day. Nothing more. Nothing less.“

I would like to thank Tamara Cianfini and Dany Griffiths from The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme for their input to „What is the Perfect Birth?“ I attended their continuous education class and loved how they addressed this question since I hadn’t been able to find the answer anywhere else. So, thank you for your inspiration, Tamara and Dany!


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